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Roasting marshmallows on bamboo sticks,
because we're still in Japan. |
At the end of July, Luther held its annual English Summer Camp. 77 students, 4 Japanese teachers, and 8 counselors (including Caroline and me) spent two days and two nights at a camp in the mountains playing games, making pizza, and speaking English. It was still warm and humid there, but the nights were deliciously cool. The dampness also allowed us to build a campfire right on the lawn! (The downside was that if we weren't quick, the air also made our s'mores soggy.) It was a good time.
It was also an example of one of my struggles as a missionary English teacher in Japan. After three summers as a staffer at a Christian summer camp back in the States, I associate camp with deepened faith and spiritual experiences. English Summer Camp was tons of fun, but the spiritual aspect I'm so used to was pretty much limited to prayers before meals.
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Luther's chapel. |
While 87 years ago Luther started as a missionary school, nowadays less than half the staff and only 3-4% of students are actually Christian. Outwardly, most of Luther's Lutheranism is only expressed in the presence of a school chaplain, mandatory daily chapel, and four American missionary English teachers. (Conversations with other teachers often amusingly go like this: "So how was your weekend? Oh, right, you had church on Sunday, of course.") And while the J-3s deliver chapel speeches regularly, and give Bibles to the kids preparing to study abroad... I'm gonna be honest. Deep spiritual conversations are not a usual part of my daily routine here. It's more like, "A rough draft is the
first time you write a paragraph," or "Kōtarō*, wake up," or "Everyone, please repeat:
Can you tell me how to get to the post office?" or "Kōtarō, move your desk back to where it was and sit down."
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Bust of a suffering Christ outside
the top-floor English classroom. |
It of course sparks many feelings of anxiety and inadequacy as a missionary. Shouldn't I end the semester with some kind of altar call or something instead of a fun movie lesson? Shouldn't I try to work in at least one Jesus reference in class? (I tried that in one of my junior high classes during a listening comprehension activity. It ended up sounding awkward and forced. I think I was jumping the gun instead of waiting for the Holy Spirit on that one.)
Sometimes I wonder if God's doing anything with me at all. I get really wrapped up in results. I like getting handed back a paper with a score on it. I can work with that. I can know if I'm "good enough." But the work of the Holy Spirit isn't about being "good enough." It's not predictable, quantifiable, or often even visible. This coming semester, I think I'll focus less on production and output, more on prayer and quiet trust. Thy way, not mine, O Lord.
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Fireworks at camp! (There is no electric light in this photo, not even camera flash. All fireworks.) |
*Names have been changed.
In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God.
Romans 8:26-17 (NIV)